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Creating a welcoming space for our girls to express themselves authentically is one of our goals at Life I Love, especially when we tackle sensitive topics like body image. It’s a balance, a mix of cultural understanding, humor, and kindness. Recently, in one of our sessions, I faced a moment that brought this delicate balance to the forefront and led me to reimagine how we discuss body image.
During Lesson 3 on Movement, we began our day with an opening circle, inviting each girl to share something she enjoys doing to move her body. Many girls shared classic childhood favorites like playing four square, swimming, and running around with friends. Then one girl chimed in with, "I like to walk to my kitchen," and everyone burst into laughter. She intended it to be funny, and it was one of those moments where everyone, including the girl herself, was genuinely laughing. Another girl followed up with a playful whisper, “big back,” and again, laughter filled the room. It felt like a moment of shared humor, a little bit of roasting - a staple of our culture that connects us through gentle teasing and playfulness.
To me, it was a sign that our space was safe enough for these girls to be themselves, joke around, and bond with each other in a way that’s deeply rooted in community and cultural understanding. When I shared the story with my board as a program highlight, it got a few laughs. But the following day, I received an email from a board member, gently pointing out that while the term “big back” might have seemed lighthearted, it could also be considered offensive and potentially harmful, even if it wasn’t meant that way.
Reflecting on this feedback, I realized the importance of balancing cultural responsiveness with the sensitivity that’s essential in a space designed for growth and self-acceptance. It sparked a deeper reflection on my part: how do we create spaces that are true to our shared culture, where humor and connection flow naturally, while ensuring we avoid inadvertently reinforcing harmful ideas around body image? It’s a tightrope, especially in today’s world where “cancel culture” can easily overshadow teachable moments.
This incident became the inspiration for our next session, Lesson 5, where we focused on body image and self-talk. I realized that even though the girls laughed in that moment, subtle and unseen hurts could linger, whether in this session or later. It was an opportunity to deepen our conversation, making sure our space would uplift each girl’s self-image.
This week, our theme was art, and we explored how it can support self-expression and manage stress, both big and small. We began with a mindfulness exercise and our usual opening circle, setting a calm, focused atmosphere for what we’d discuss. Then, we moved into a conversation about body image—a subject close to my heart. We talked openly about how the way we see ourselves is often shaped by the things we hear from others, and how that can be stressful. We discussed positive self-talk as a way to counteract negativity and how surrounding ourselves with kind, supportive people can help us feel more confident.
As a group, we practiced our call-and-response mantra, “All different, all beautiful.” This is more than just a saying for us; it’s a reminder that beauty is unique and that each of us contributes something valuable to the world. The girls embraced this, seeing themselves as part of a community where everyone’s differences are celebrated and respected.
After our conversation on body image, we turned to art as a way to channel our thoughts and emotions. The girls had a chance to try painting with repetitive strokes, a technique that brings calm and focus. Whether with paint, markers, or simple doodling, repetitive strokes can help relieve stress and provide a creative outlet for self-expression. As they painted, I could see the girls settling into a peaceful rhythm, expressing themselves in colors and patterns that felt unique to them.
The lesson not only allowed the girls to be creative but also showed them that self-care can be fun, fulfilling, and something they do for themselves.
This experience taught me the importance of cultivating an inclusive, sensitive space for all girls while honoring our culture and shared humor. Creating a safe space means sometimes taking a step back and acknowledging that even well-intended moments can have an impact beyond our immediate understanding. It’s a lesson in balancing cultural authenticity with compassion, something I hope to impart to our girls as they grow.
Body image will always be a challenging topic, but with every lesson, our goal is to provide tools for self-confidence and resilience. My hope is that each of these girls grows up with a healthy self-image, feeling strong in who they are, knowing they are, indeed, “all different, all beautiful.”